I’m just picturing this. After a party at a Boston College dorm, this kid has to get up and go to the dining hall because after all the draft beer and shots he needs some greasy eggs stat! He sees the crime that has been committed to his entire body and decides there’s no sense in trying to hide it because it’s totally impossible. So he puts on a wife beater and some baggy jeans where his boxers stick up out of the back. He saunters into the dining hall to commence the “I got chiefed” walk of shame. And the crime scene evidence:
Notice how someone had the forethought to bring several different colors of Sharpies to this shin dig. Also, I really like the special touches they added like the red nose and lips. Guy must have been seriously out of it to not notice someone coloring with a felt tip marker on his lips. What am I talking about. Of course he was out of it. He could have had his nut sack pierced and wouldn’t have moved an eyelash.
Evidently among the party goers were some burgeoning artists from all fields of study. The Sex Ed majors cleverly drew cocks and balls all over their comatose comrade. I sense there were some history majors at the party as well. They must be covering WWII Germany as I can make out a couple of swastikas. The Pagan Theology students were there as well, making their mark with the pentagram, and I’m thinking it was the Performing Arts/Theater kids who did the face makeup.
The real story is supposed to be about the Patriots cheerleader who took part in the activities and posted the pictures on her Facebook page. I could give a shit about her. The unsung hero of this is clearly the drunk dude who got Chiefed Cock & Balls style. Hope he didn’t have a trip home to Mom and Dad planned in the days following this party.
Someone you can bet will not fall victim to being chiefed? My Joe Jonas. He obviously takes pride in himself and the alledged purity ring symbolizes abstinence from alcohol. Thank God – I would not want to see the mess above on this fucking gorgeousness!
